Communication Habits of East Timorese Men: Understanding Their Style and Expressions

Introduction: Communication in Timor-Leste

East Timorese men, like much of the population in Timor-Leste, exhibit a mix of traditional and modern communication styles. Their verbal and non-verbal cues often reflect the country’s colonial history and the local cultural context. Portuguese and Tetum are the main languages spoken, and these influence the expressions used across generations. Many East Timorese men place a strong emphasis on respect, politeness, and maintaining harmony during conversations.

Communication Habits by Age Group

12-18 Years Old

Young East Timorese males, especially those attending school, communicate in a hybrid of Tetum, Portuguese, and sometimes Indonesian due to past influences. Informal language, such as short greetings like "Oi" (hello), is common among peers. Their communication often revolves around humor and camaraderie, with handshakes or light touches as non-verbal expressions of friendship. Social media also plays a significant role in shaping their communication patterns, with abbreviations and emojis frequently used in digital conversations.

19-29 Years Old

In this age group, many men begin to engage in more formal communication settings, particularly in workplaces or universities. They start incorporating more Portuguese in their speech, which is seen as a more educated or professional language. For example, "Como estás?" (How are you?) is a formal greeting. However, among friends, casual and relaxed conversations dominate, where phrases like "Tudo bem?" (Is everything good?) and "Vamos lá!" (Let’s go!) are frequently used. Non-verbal cues such as nods and eye contact are important in demonstrating respect during discussions.

30-39 Years Old

By their thirties, East Timorese men often take on leadership roles in their families and communities. Communication at this age is centered around maintaining harmony, respect, and modesty. Men in this age group use more refined and respectful language, especially when talking to elders or people in authority. Tetum phrases like "Bondia" (Good morning) or "Obrigadu barak" (Thank you very much) are used frequently in formal and social interactions. Professional conversations are straightforward, with an emphasis on clarity and respect.

40 Years Old and Above

Older East Timorese men often have a traditional and formal approach to communication. Conversations are respectful and focus on maintaining social harmony. Elders in Timor-Leste use polite forms of address and may refer to traditional customs during communication. Tetum expressions like "Diak ka lae?" (Are you well?) and "Ha’u kontenti" (I am happy) are often heard. There is a greater use of non-verbal communication, such as respectful posture, gestures of deference, and steady eye contact, which signify politeness and authority.

Common Phrases and Slang by Age Group

12-18 Years Old

• "Oi" – A casual greeting among young peers.
• "Xau" – Goodbye in Portuguese, used casually.
• "Tudo bem?" – Meaning “Is everything good?” used to check in on friends.
• "Bole bola" – Refers to someone who is joking or fooling around.
• "Vamos!" – Let’s go, a common term used among friends for enthusiasm.

19-29 Years Old

• "Como estás?" – A more formal way of asking "How are you?" in Portuguese.
• "Vamos lá" – Let’s go, used in both casual and semi-formal conversations.
• "Obrigado" – Thank you in Portuguese, commonly used in professional settings.
• "Saudável" – Meaning healthy, a phrase often used in conversations about well-being.
• "Força" – Meaning strength, used to encourage someone to keep going or stay strong.

30-39 Years Old

• "Bondia" – Good morning in Tetum, commonly used in both formal and informal settings.
• "Diak ka lae?" – Are you well? A polite inquiry often used in greeting elders or superiors.
• "Obrigadu barak" – Thank you very much, showing appreciation in formal settings.
• "Kontenti" – Happy, used to express contentment in social or family settings.
• "La bele" – You shouldn’t, used as an advisory phrase in serious discussions.

40 Years Old and Above

• "Ha’u diak" – I am well, often used in polite responses during conversations with younger people.
• "Moris diak" – Live well, used as a blessing or a way to wish others a good life.
• "Ha’u kontenti" – I am happy, used in both formal and informal gatherings.
• "Obrigadu barak" – Thank you very much, a phrase used with elders or officials.
• "Labarik" – A term meaning child, often used affectionately when referring to the younger generation.

Conclusion

When communicating with East Timorese men, understanding their cultural emphasis on respect and harmony is key. Younger men tend to adopt a more casual and modern style of communication, while older generations adhere to traditional, formal language, especially in more serious contexts. Tetum, Portuguese, and local slang all play a role in everyday communication, and knowing a few key phrases can go a long way in building rapport. It’s important to pay attention to non-verbal cues, as gestures and posture often convey just as much as words in East Timorese culture.