Communication Habits of Togolese Men: Tradition Meets Modern Expressions

Introduction: Understanding Togolese Men's Communication

In Togo, communication is deeply rooted in respect, community values, and family. Togolese men, regardless of age, tend to prioritize politeness and the use of indirect language, especially when addressing elders or those in authority. The primary languages include French (the official language), Ewe, and Kabye, with many men seamlessly switching between them depending on the social context. This adaptability reflects the country’s complex cultural tapestry, where verbal and non-verbal communication work in tandem to convey messages.

Communication Habits by Age Group

12-18 Years Old

Togolese boys in this age group typically communicate casually with their peers, often mixing Ewe or Kabye with French. Phrases like "Ça va?" (How’s it going?) are popular for greeting friends, while "Je m'en fous" (I don’t care) is a common, informal expression of dismissal. At home or in formal settings, they use more respectful language, such as "Monsieur" when addressing elders, reflecting the cultural emphasis on respect for authority.

19-29 Years Old

As young men in Togo begin to enter the workforce or higher education, their communication style becomes a mix of casual and formal, depending on the situation. In business contexts, it’s crucial to address people using their titles, often in French. Phrases like "Merci beaucoup" (Thank you very much) and "Pardon" (Excuse me) are commonly used to show politeness. In social settings, they continue to use informal language with peers but maintain a sense of deference to elders.

30-39 Years Old

By their thirties, Togolese men are often expected to take on leadership roles within their families and communities. Their communication style shifts towards offering guidance and maintaining authority, often using proverbs or indirect speech. Common expressions like "Tout ira bien" (Everything will be fine) help convey calm and reassurance, while "Respectons les aînés" (We must respect the elders) underscores the cultural emphasis on hierarchy.

40 Years Old and Above

Older Togolese men command significant respect in society, and their communication reflects this status. They often use proverbs and indirect expressions to provide wisdom and guidance. Silence, too, is a key part of their communication, allowing for reflection. Phrases like "Patience est mère de toutes les vertus" (Patience is the mother of all virtues) are frequently employed to offer advice, emphasizing the values of patience and respect.

Common Phrases and Expressions by Age Group

12-18 Years Old

• "Ça va?" – How’s it going?; casual greeting among friends.
• "Je m'en fous" – I don’t care; used informally to dismiss something.
• "Monsieur" – Mr.; used to show respect to elders.
• "Salut" – Hi; informal greeting among peers.
• "Pas de problème" – No problem; often used to reassure.

19-29 Years Old

• "Merci beaucoup" – Thank you very much; polite expression.
• "Pardon" – Excuse me; used to seek forgiveness or attention.
• "On se voit demain" – See you tomorrow; used in casual parting.
• "Ça marche" – It’s working/It’s fine; used to confirm things are going well.
• "Ça te va?" – Does that suit you?; asking for agreement.

30-39 Years Old

• "Respectons les aînés" – We must respect the elders; emphasizes respect.
• "Tout ira bien" – Everything will be fine; used to comfort or reassure.
• "Patience est mère de toutes les vertus" – Patience is the mother of all virtues; a common proverb for advice.
• "On y va?" – Shall we go?; used to initiate departure.
• "D'accord" – Alright/Okay; used to show agreement.

40 Years Old and Above

• "Patience est mère de toutes les vertus" – Patience is the mother of all virtues; often used as advice.
• "Il faut du temps" – It takes time; to emphasize patience.
• "Sidéré" – Astonished; used when surprised by something.
• "C'est la vie" – That’s life; a philosophical acceptance of things.
• "Je vous remercie" – I thank you; formal expression of gratitude.

Conclusion: Effective Communication with Togolese Men

When communicating with Togolese men, particularly elders, it’s essential to show respect and patience. Understanding their use of indirect language, as well as proverbs, is key to navigating conversations effectively. Using polite phrases such as "Merci" and maintaining non-verbal cues like eye contact and patience during pauses will enhance communication. Above all, respect for hierarchy and tradition is central to building meaningful relationships in Togo.